Don’t waste your time in life trying to get everyone to like you.  Additionally, don’t worry about trying to keep those who like you now to remain liking you—just do you.  You will find that you will live a happier life when you’re more concerned with doing things that please you.  When you devote too much time to attempting to figure out what is going to satisfy every single person around you, then you will lose who you are in all of those efforts to please everyone.  You cannot be all things to everyone.  In no way does this piece advocate for you to be a selfish person, it just acknowledges you have to take time for yourself to enjoy the things you love to do.  You have to appreciate yourself.

When you periodically do things that are totally for yourself, this does not make you a selfish person—it makes you a person who understands that you cannot truly know how to be happy for someone else until you’ve made yourself happy.  Don’t depend on other people to make you happy.  You have the ability within yourself to make yourself happy.  When you depend on other people to be happy, then you’re going to face a significant number of disappoints in life.  You may never be truly happy when you wait on others to create true happiness within you.

True happiness originates within yourself.  Yes, others can and will help your happiness to mature but don’t let others be the foundation of your happiness.  If other people are the foundation of your happiness, it will inevitably crumble.

Too many people are far too focused on how they can get everyone to like them.  You must understand that everyone will not like you.  Some people will not like you without any rationale—don’t try to force them to like you because you won’t win them over.  It’s better to have one or two good or great friends than to hang around a thousand people who you’ve fooled yourself that they’re your friends just so you can tout you have such a large number of friends.  It certainly does not seem like you’re attempting to truly please yourself when you do this type of thing.

Participating in popularity contests will leave you exhausted, empty, disappointed, and unhappy.

Live in your own spotlight!

Have enough confidence in yourself to believe you can do whatever you desire to do.  When people tell you that you cannot do something, transfer their negativity into positive energy.  You don’t have to settle for doing the popular things that will gain you instant approval from people who are looking for microwave success.  You have to know that if the path to success you have carefully planned takes years and not days, that you’re going to reach your goals and you’re no lesser of a success story than those who were fortunate to achieve success in a shorter period of time.  For those who achieve success in a shorter period of time than you, please be sure that they’re truly successful and not putting on a visage of success.

Worry about yourself sometimes.  Stop looking for approval from other people.  People who win popularity contests really lose tremendously in the game of life.

Enjoy life.  Be stress free.  Live free!

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

On this day, Revolutionary Paideia pays tribute to the life and legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.  Dr. King’s contributions to the United States of America are immeasurable.  It was because of his unwillingness to remain silent in the face of egregious injustice and oppression that gave us all an opportunity to understand what America can truly be when we live up to the utopian ideals and values promulgated in the Declaration of Independence.  As I watched the annual tribute to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. at Ebenezer Baptist Church in Atlanta, Georgia on television, I very much enjoyed the beautiful celebration of the life and legacy of Dr. King.  The celebration of Dr. King’s contributions to America and the world were exquisitely stated by a range of diverse individuals from America and across the globe, evincing a microcosm of the utopian multiracial democracy Dr. King envisioned.

Although I thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated the excellent tribute to Dr. King at Ebenezer Baptist Church, one thing that troubled me was many speakers stated their opposition to new state voter identification laws that, in their opinion, disproportionately impact the poor and minorities, but no one presented a plan to help them to overcome the barriers of the new state voter identification laws.

It’s important to highlight that Mayor Kasim Reed, mayor of Atlanta, did assert that people who have state identification cards need to make sure others who don’t have them get them.  Instead of investing so much energy in protesting new state voter identification laws, such as the one in Georgia, there needs to be greater focus on how to get everyone a state identification card.  While one can understand people having frustrations with new state voter identification laws that they contend adversely impact the poor and minorities, and function as a poll tax, protesting without offering solutions is unproductive.  For those who are concerned about the new voter identification laws being a means of suppressing votes, then use your resources to pay for people to receive state identification cards who cannot afford them.

Organizations like the National Urban League can use their resources, including their money, to pay for as many people who cannot afford to pay for a state identification card.  If you’re really concerned about people not being able to pay for a state identification card to vote, then why not pay for them to get one if you have the money?  Why not have a billionaire financer of liberal causes, George Soros, to fund efforts across the nation to get state identification cards for those who cannot afford them?  This is a time when liberal organizations have to come together to pool their resources to cancel out the impact that new state voter identification laws have on the ability of the poor and minorities to vote.

If there is real evidence of these new state voter identification laws preventing people from being able to vote, then the evidence needs to be offered.  While we want to make sure that everyone who has the right to vote can vote, we need to have concern for voter fraud as well.  Although it may sound good to say that we need to be more concerned about getting more people to vote once, and emphasize how difficult it is to get them to vote once, there is a reality that people attempt to commit fraud at the polls.  Evidence of voter fraud has been presented.  Now, it’s time for evidence to be offered that proves that new state voter identification laws suppress votes.

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

Increasingly, we’re witnessing how many kickers are not performing satisfactorily at all levels of football.  To put it bluntly, many kickers are causing many teams to lose.  Although it’s kind to say that “we win as a team and we lose as a team,” the reality is one player can cause the team to lose.  As a football and basketball coach, I know how important it is to teach your players about teamwork and winning and losing as a team.  However, as a successful young coach, I’ve learned that it’s vital to hold a player accountable for the things he does on the field or court.  It’s not always the team that does not do what it is supposed to do, but it is often an individual player who does not do what he is supposed to do.  Coaches must hold a player accountable and not the team accountable when a player does not do the things he needs to do to help the team win.  Without question, many kickers are costing teams games they should win.

It’s understandable if a kicker misses a 40 yard field goal or longer.  However, when a kicker misses a short 25 or 30 yard field goal, it’s completely unacceptable.  Missing an extra point is unpardonable.  Kickers need to understand that they need to work as hard as anyone else on the team to be ready to execute the tasks they are asked to perform during a game.  We’re all going to make mistakes, but missing a short field goal is something a kicker should not do during a game.  One cannot even begin to defend a kicker who misses an extra point.

We’re learning just how valuable kickers are to the game of football.

When punting the ball, it’s essential for kickers to make an effective punt to put the opposing offense in a spot on the field that is unfavorable for the opposing team.  During the kickoff, they need to put the ball in a spot that is going to make it most difficult for the opposing team to be able to get good field position.

Many coaches are going to have to put greater emphasis on establishing and maintaining a good kicking game.  While we don’t want to cause a kicker to commit suicide because of a missed field goal or extra point that resulted in a loss for his team, coaches are going to have make sure that a kicker is just as ready for each game as any other player is.

While most people who desire to play football want to be a quarterback, running back, wide receiver, or some other high profile position player, it’s a good time for you to become a kicker because you could make a significant amount of money right now, considering there’s a dearth of good kickers currently playing the game.

If you have a good kicker on your team, make sure you let him know how much you appreciate him.  If you have a struggling kicker on your team, then let him know how vital his improvement is to your team being able to be successful.

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

You can make yourself look and feel like a fool when you think that a person was and is so mesmerized by you sexually—when in reality, he or she was just having sex with you just because you were available.  Some people think that because a person was asking and/or wanting to have sex with them a significant number of times means that he or she has an obsession.  If you’re this type of person, then you need to reconsider your thinking.  If a person has a high sex drive or is just looking for affection because there is really not many options available in the area, then you’ve got to understand that it’s not really about how great you are, but more about you being able to supply the person’s needs.  Therefore, don’t go around thinking that you’re all that because the person was desiring you so much—he or she could have been just using you for sex, and you’re going around thinking that he or she just cannot get enough of you.

You have to understand that people have sexual needs and when options to have sex are limited, you may just be their means to an end.

While you are out telling people that the person is obsessed with you, you must have been obsessed with the person too because you were willing to have sex with him or her so many times.  Did you ever think about this?  Did the thought ever cross your mind that you were the one getting dominated and played?

Just because someone asked and/or wanted to have sex with you a significant number of times does not mean that you are a good sexual performer.  Again, if he or she has limited options available, then you are just his or her most reasonable option to having sexual intercourse.  Now, when people have extremely high sex drives, they may try to get sex from almost anyone available.  Therefore, you could be that person who was just available to help them satisfy their sexual appetite.

For those of you who think that you are some type of sexual prize, you might need to reconsider your thinking. You might just be someone’s useful idiot.  Did you ever consider that you are and/or have been someone’s useful idiot?

Things are not always what they seem.

Excessive arrogance can cause you to overestimate your sexual worth.  It can cause you to not try to make yourself better each time you have sex.  Therefore, while you thought that you were providing the individual with the greatest sexual experience that he or she has ever had each time you had sex, you really were not because your excessive arrogance led you to never ask how you performed.

If you’re a whore, that is, you have had sex with so many people, then you should not be parading around like you’re something special.  Please! Everyone in town has probably slept with you.  What’s special about you now?

Be careful about thinking that everybody wants you.  It can be that they see you’re just easy and always available.  Do you feel so arrogant now?

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

If you messed up with someone you once was in a serious relationship with and he or she gives you another chance, then you certainly should not revert to doing the same things that caused the person to break up with you the first time you were in a relationship.  You cannot argue about the person needs to trust you when you’re doing the same things that ended your previous relationship with him or her.  Yes, if your ex has agreed to take you back, then he or she should be willing to trust you again and not immediately start accusing you of wrongdoing.  However, you cannot engage in the same practices that resulted in the termination of your first relationship with him or her.  If you do, then it’s justified for him or her to question you about potential wrongdoing(s).

For instance, if the reason your ex broke up with you in the past was you cheated on him or her, then you would not want to be in the bed with him or her at 3:00 a.m. texting.  This is completely unacceptable.  If the reason why your ex broke up with was you were spending the majority of your time with your friends and not enough with him or her, you might not want to make that same mistake again.  It already takes a significant amount of courage for your ex to take you back after you have done something wrong for him or her to break up with you in the past, so you have to be very considerate about the things you do during your newly established relationship.  Avoid giving your partner even the slightest impression that you’re involved in wrongdoing.

Open and frank communication is mandatory to establishing and maintaining a successful relationship.  Many of the phenomena that couples fuss about would never evolve into problems if they would establish open and frank communication.

If you want your newly formed relationship with your ex to have a chance to succeed, you also need to avoid telling him or her lies.  You need to tell your partner the truth even when it seems like telling the truth is impossible.  Please don’t lie about small things.  If you have to lie about small things, then your partner will have a difficult time trusting anything you say and do.  Of course, without trust your relationship will end quickly.

Focus on the positive things that led you and your partner to reunite.  Far too often, we concentrate primarily on the negative and not enough on the positive.  Now, if there are not enough positive things for you and your partner to focus on, then just save yourselves a whole lot of trouble and don’t reunite.  Your relationship will be doomed from the beginning if you don’t have enough positive things to concentrate on.

Before you make an attempt to reunite with your ex, be sure that you’re mentally, physically, and spiritually prepared.  It can be a beautiful thing to reunite with your ex, and it can be an ugly thing to reunite with your ex when you’re not prepared to do so.

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

Although many other people were strongly considered for The Revolutionary Paideia 2011 Person of the Year, Drake was finally selected.  With Drake’s recent impressive sales on his sophomore rap album, Take Care, he deserves to be recognized as The Revolutionary Paideia December 2011 Person of the Month.  Drake embodies the “unsettling, unnerving, and unhousing” spirit that found this site.  Drake is a rapper who does not try to fit the traditional rap mold.  He doesn’t try to be a gangsta rapper or act all “hard” just to appease those who expect all men, including male rappers, to be hypermasculine.  You won’t find Drake talking about gangbanging and dope dealing in his art.  What you will hear, however, is a truly one of a kind rapper who is not afraid to challenge the status quo in rap music and in Hip-Hop in general.

Take Care sold over 630,000 copies in the first week it was released (Take Care’s First Week Sells).  The early success of the album is evidence of Drake’s serious commitment to continuing to ameliorate his craft.  Drake is simply not another rapper and Hip-Hop artist—he’s a talent reconceptualizing the way we think about rap music, Hip-Hop, masculinity, success, and much more.  If you’re looking for a positive example in rap music and Hip-Hop, Drake is one of the best examples of rap music and Hip-Hop at their best.

Because Drake has elected to not be a gangsta rapper and be “hard,” he has come under attack from many people.  Even someone who I deeply admire, Dr. Marc Lamont Hill, expressed that he hates Drake.  For someone who does not know him personally, that’s certainly too strong of an emotion to have.  Those who claim to be “thugs” find Drake to be too “soft” to be considered a real rapper, and they argue that he is more of a pop singer than a rapper because he sings on some of his rap songs.  Why hate on this man’s ability to sing?  So do you have to be a “thug” to be a real rapper?  Do you have to be gangsta rapper to be a true rapper?  Do you have to have been in jail, sell and use dope, grew up poor, and have lyrics permeated with violence to be a real rapper?  The answer to the three aforementioned questions is no.  Getting that answer across to many people is a difficult task, however.

It is with great pleasure that I name Drake The Revolutionary Paideia 2011 Person of the Year and The Revolutionary Paideia December 2011 Person of the Month.  With so many unsubstantiated attacks on Drake that one can find on the internet, including Twitter and Facebook, it is my hope that this piece will offer a refreshing and positive look into one of the greatest rappers, artists, and Hip-Hop figures to ever live.  These awards given by Revolutionary Paideia are small tokens of love and appreciation for this great man and artist.  Continue to do spectacular things and continue to be who you really are.  Congrats, Drake!

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

Although you don’t want to have a complete fear of commitment, many people need to have a little more caution about who they choose to date.  Many people are just too happy to be intimately involved with someone or to have the appearance being intimately involved with someone that they neglect to do some of the basic research that can be quite helpful in discovering that their “special” woman or man is really not just “special” to them but to others as well.  If you do some asking around about the person you’re involved with, you just may find some valid things about him or her that he or she has not shared with you.  You may even be surprised with what those who hang around you all of the time can reveal to you about who you’re dating.

You have to have a willingness to listen to what people around you may have to say about the person you’re dating.  Of course, there will be many people out there that will simply hate on the person you’re dating, but you can eliminate those folks by asking them to give you proof to verify what they’re saying.  People who really have some knowledge about the person you’re dating can provide you with some proof of what they’re claiming.

In no way does this piece assert that you should become a private investigator or hire one to investigate the person you’re involved with.  This piece does, however, contend that you should ask that person serious questions and ask questions about the person to people who knew him or her before you did.  You just may be amazed at what you find out!

You can make yourself look like a fool when you go around acting and talking like you have the most special person in the world when that’s the same person who has slept with nearly everyone in town, or has slept with whorish people you know you don’t want to come behind.  You don’t have to turn into an interrogator, but it certainly is a wise decision to asking some probing questions before you truly commit yourself to a person.  A person who is truly committed to you will not mind you asking questions about their past and what he or she is doing right now.

If you discover that the person you’re dating has slept with one of your friends, do you really want to continue to be with that person?

Of course, everyone has a past and if you find out aspects about someone’s past that you don’t like, then that’s up to you how you judge that person for what he or she has done in the past.  For example, if you discover that the person you are dating has been really whorish in the past, you may resolve that this is not the person you want to stay committed to or desire to build anything further.  However, if you learn that someone has slept with your friend or associate since you’ve been together, then you need to reassess whether or not you should be with that person, especially if you’ve asked the person you’re dating if he or she has slept with that person before and the response was no.

Again, don’t go to extremes in your attempts to learn more about the person you’re dating, but do some basic research about your mate.  Start with basic questioning.  If you don’t have open and frank communication with your mate, then the relationship is going to end inevitably anyway.

Before you present the person you’re dating to the public as being so “special,” make sure he or she is not also someone else’s intimately “special” person too.

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

Don’t take your frustrations out on others.  If there are specific people causing you to be frustrated, then direct your anger toward those individuals—not everyone else.  You have to learn how to take control of your emotions.  Your emotions are your emotions.  Don’t force everyone around you to have to deal with your problems.  When you’re having an unpleasant day, you shouldn’t try to make everybody else have an unpleasant day.  We can learn a significant amount about ourselves when we begin to think critically about how we handle being frustrated.  Just because you’re frustrated doesn’t give you valid justification to make drastic decisions.  When many people get frustrated, they start to acting like it’s the end of the world.

You have to understand that things are not going to go well for you every day.  If you’re an adult and claim to be mature, then you shouldn’t have to be told that everything is not always going to go well for you.

It’s okay to be frustrated from time to time—being frustrated is a normal part of the human experience.  You shouldn’t be frustrated all of the time, however.  If you’re frustrated all of the time, then you need to seek professional mental health treatment.  People should not shy away from getting mental health treatment.  One of the fundamental purposes of mental health treatment is to empower you with the ability to be in more control of yourself.

Don’t allow a frustrating day to become a serious crisis.  You have to understand that some things will happen and you will need to move on from those things.  Sitting around having a pity party is not going to change anything about your frustrations—it will only make things worse.  It’s very unattractive for you to resort to the most extreme measures when you’re going through frustrating moments.  People will begin to think that it’s best for them to not be around you.  You don’t want people to isolate themselves from you simply because you fly off the handle every time you’re frustrated.

Learn how to handle your problems responsibly.  If you need assistance with conflict resolution, please seek professional assistance.  You may even find it useful to speak with mature and successful people around you who can give you counseling about how to better deal with conflicts in your life.  If you’re always overreacting to problems you have in your life, then there’s something truly wrong with you mentally.  It’s okay to admit that you have mental problems.  By admitting that you have mental problems, you can get the help you need to address those problems.

Again, we all have been frustrated before.  Of course, we all would love to never experience frustration.  However, we know that we can never eliminate experiencing frustration.  How we respond to frustration is much more important than being frustrated.  Acting responsibly and maturely when you’re frustrated can help you to develop into a better person and allow you to discover things about yourself you didn’t even know.

Make every effort to stay in control of your emotions. Stop overacting.  Live responsibly.

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

Before you begin to think critically about the question the title poses, let’s suspend our religious beliefs and values for this particular discourse.  Of course, the bible informs us to let God fight our battles.  However, let’s remove ourselves from the teachings of the bible for at least this discourse to explore whether getting revenge is useful.  Even if you have difficulty with temporarily suspending your religious beliefs and values to enter this discourse, you may find that you would arrive at how you feel about revenge without the teachings you have received in your religious sects.  It can be quite beneficial to explore whether or not we gain any true benefits from seeking revenge on those who have wronged us.

Although some may see it as childish for adults to seek revenge, it’s vital to consider that many wars throughout history have been fought to obtain revenge.  Therefore, unless you’re prepared to offer a serious argument for why many wars that have been fought throughout history have been childish, then don’t just call an adult childish for desiring to seek revenge.  While we have to brush many things off of our shoulders in life, considering we cannot fight every battle, there are times when we need to make people pay for the terrible things they’ve done to us.

If someone just walks up and slaps you in the face, do you let him or her get away with this?  If you catch someone in the act of destroying your property, do you simply let him or her get away with this?

Are there times when seeking revenge is justified?

You cannot allow people to do everything to you and not make them suffer some consequences.  While you may have been taught to be the better person and not to try to seek revenge on another person, this teaching can cause you to get trampled on by many people.  If people are out there attacking you, then you need to defend yourself against their attacks.  At some point, you have to respond to serious attacks.  Don’t think constant attacks will not have their impact on you—they will.

When you’re engaged in a battle with someone, use all legal things at your disposal to defeat him or her.  Never come away from a battle talking about what you could have done to win that battle—do it while you’re in the battle.  Don’t feel sorry for those who are out there trying to destroy you.  Do you think they are concerned about you?  Why be concerned about them?

There may come a time when you have to get revenge on a family member or close friend.  You have to be willing to make a family member or close friend who has intentionally sought to harm you pay for intentional wrongs.  Don’t concern yourself with taking it easy on a family member or close friend who has not demonstrated a true concern for you through their words and/or actions.  Would a true close friend or family member intentionally and maliciously attempt to hurt you?  If the answer is yes, then you have to be willing to show him or her that you’re not going to sit around and allow him or her to destroy you.  Fight back!

Some people think everything is okay when they are doing the attacking, but they really think you have done them viciously wrong when you strike back at them.  When some people are out there doing and saying horrible things about you, they need to think more deeply about what power, talents, influence, and etc. you possess before they intentionally do and say things to hurt you.

If you feel the need to get revenge on someone, don’t let anyone deter you—go for it!

Do you think it’s useful to get revenge on someone who has wronged you?

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison